Some couples create wedding “do not play” lists, for reasons ranging from the personal to the political.
Liz Lindenmeier and Xavier Barreto designed a specific vibe for their wedding in Tulum, Mexico, last March: “a big jungle rave party with all of our friends and family,” as she described it.
And Mrs. Lindenmeier, the founder of Lit&Lean, a nightlife-inspired workout, had a strategy for avoiding music that wasn’t on theme. She and Mr. Barreto, who are both 31 and live in Queens, submitted a list of about 300 song requests to their D.J. That way, she figured, there wasn’t “a chance that they’re going to go play this random artist and song.” (Electronic dance music, 2010 hits and “Shake It Off” by Taylor Swift were successfully played, she added.)
Other couples curate their guests’ musical experience by creating “do not play” lists of songs that conflict with their themes, tastes or values.
Rebecca Keren Jablonski, a 39-year-old rabbi in Manhattan, made a list of about 90 tracks for the D.J. ahead of her wedding, to Benjamin Jablonski, last March. She also made a list of who to avoid: namely Kanye West, a self-proclaimed Nazi.
“If a song is controversial or offensive to any community member, that should really be thought about,” she said, adding that couples create “a whole world on their wedding day for themselves and their guests.”
Don Woodbury, a wedding D.J. based in Salt Lake City, said he asks clients to list five to 10 songs, or an entire genre, that they would like him to avoid. “I like to know what might offend somebody, or not hit well with that particular client,” he said. (But, he added, he has his limits: “I’ve gotten lists of 30, 40, 50 songs on a ‘do not play’ list, and at that point it’s overly prescriptive.”)
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